Funny +
Humor quotes
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Funny Quotes
Sun came up on time today morning. None of the planets in this solar system collided today. In the whole universe no accidents, in this endless cosmos no accidents, everything going great but you have one nasty little thought crawling in your head and it's a bad day, you've completely lost perception with lifeFunny Perspective Planet
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It doesn't matter which religion, which nonsense you belong to, the moment you get God's stamp on what you believe in, that's it, you don't have to apply your intelligence and see what you are doing with lifeFunny God Religion Belief
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When it comes to animal husbandry, we’re thinking of breeding right, as human beings why are we not thinking of breeding right? Because we are too identified with our own body. “It’s mine” is more important than what’s rightFunny Being human Body-mind Body
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These days people are on self-help, they manufacture their diseases, they don't wait for any infection to happenFunny Health
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Language is a kind of a conspiracy between two people, it’s a widespread conspiracyFunny Short
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If you arrange sounds in a certain way, it will become noise. If you arrange sounds in a different way, it will become music. There’s whole lot of noise passing as music right nowFunny
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Even now, for 98% of the population in Nepal, going to the temple and seeking their mukti is still the highest thing in their mind, which is largely lost in India. Mukti is not the highest thing in India; going to America is the highest thing.Funny Seeking Mind Liberation
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Memory is like a treadmill. It gives you a lot of exercise, never takes you anywhereFunny Short
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There are only two kinds of people in the world - Mystics and Mistakes.Funny Short Mysticism
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Are you preparing for a university or the universe? That's where you have to live, unless you want to become an academic.Funny
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Short +
Humor quotes
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Short Quotes
Youthfulness is about how vibrantly alive you are, not when you were bornShort Witty Youth
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If you treat sick people well they don't want to become healthyShort Health
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Work of a Guru is to make the mystical available to the human being, what is available, they are making it mysticalShort Guru
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Destiny is what you create for yourself. Fate is when you fail to create your own destinyShort
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If ignorance was bliss, by now the whole world should be blissed out.Short Ignorance World
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Family was one bunch of people who were like a net for the circus that you did.Short People
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If you have become two within yourself (dilemma), then for sure you are heading for madnessShort
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If yoga is Hindu, gravity must be ChristianShort Yoga
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If you make hospitals extremely comfortable, it will become an incentive to become sickShort
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All Humor Quotes ⇑
Largely there's no education in the world. There are ancillary units, supplying cogs to the main machine. Human beings are like fuel for a larger machine that we have created.Education Children World
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A whole lot of people are carrying grave faces as if they are practicing the final posture. Time we work towards life, not death. Because when it comes to death, everybody is a Natural Star.Death Funny Life People
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If I do it, God was willing; if I don't do it, he's not willing. This is a horrible trick, but it goes on in the world. Everything that matters to them anyway they will do. If you ask something they'll say, 'Godwilling.' Will they say, 'If God-willing I will have my dinner?' No, they will eatGod
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Salt is good only if in a small quantity, only if it mixes with something. If you found this big ball of salt in your sambar… it is bad, Only when it merges with something it is good. If it sticks out salt is bad. So that’s how life will feel if you stick outLife
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You got into a car, you don’t know what these three pedals are, just kick any one of them whenever you feel like it, you know, what a jerky driver you will be? That’s what has happened to human beings. It is not that people do not know peace, health, love, joy, they know all these things but it’s jerky; it’s not sustainableLife Wisdom Humanity Health
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The way we have structured our economic process in the planet is such that if we fail we will be depressed, if we succeed we will be damnedSuccess Economics
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Everybody has a philosophy for whatever they're doing, for whatever nonsense that anybody is doing they have the support of a philosophy of their own, without a philosophy you cannot continue to do stupid things all your life, your intelligence will not allow you to do itLife Philosophy Intelligence
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If you give me 28 hours of focused time, I will build a vehicle for you which will naturally transport you inward. But you want it today evening? it's not going to workTime Spirituality
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As a human being have you moved forward or backward? This is something that you have to evaluate today, you must evaluate every night but if you are a lousy accountant of life, at least once a year you must evaluate.Life
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If people around you cannot help loving you, that’s a nice way to be.. if you have made yourself in such a way that nobody around you can love you, then the only succor you have is God- it’s the most unfortunate way to liveGod Love People
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Hope is for the sad. They are hoping that tomorrow, they will be joyful. The joyful are joyful right now.Inspirational Success Joy
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We have to make people realize that God doesn’t need soldiers who fight for himGod Witty Wisdom
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People said beauty is skin deep. Yes, a certain type of beauty is skin deep. You wouldn't like somebody with their skin peeled off. If you saw somebody's skin peeled off you wouldn't think they're beautiful even if they're the same people
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We know how to go to Mars, but we still don't know how to live on this planet, that is definitely poverty.
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I would say over 85 percent of the people do not know what's health. They've not experienced it. Maybe they knew it as children where they bounced around. If you're healthy, you feel like bouncing around. That means If you are grave. You know your destination.Experience Health
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Devotion is always been the quickest and most successful way. But only problem is they may look like nuts to the rest of the society. If you don’t mind looking like a nut, or if you have realized you are one whichever way then there is no problem being a devotee.Society Spirituality Devotion
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when we initiate people something comes alive a little bit, people are jumpy what's happening. You are coming alive, you've been dead for a long time. This is called raising the deadDeath Life Spirituality
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Over seventy percent of the ailments on the planet are chronic in nature. That means you are producing your own ailment, this is called self-help
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Yoga means- Not just about twisting your body, not about standing on your head, not about holding your breath, all these things a circus artist can do better than most YogisYoga Body
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Our idea of love is to stuff the people with as much food as we canLove Short Food India
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If you are not sufficiently lubricated, every transaction is a point of friction, a possible friction. Some make every transaction a point of friction, some conduct everything gracefully. The purpose of temples is to make you well lubricated, so that you pass through life with least frictionLife
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They said, ‘You meditate.’ I said, ‘I don't know how to meditate.’ They said, ‘You are teaching meditation to everybody, you don't know how to mediate?’ I said, ‘Yes, I teach meditation to people because they do not know how to sit still.’Meditation
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Our idea of education is entirely English unfortunately. Everybody is going to the university. For what? We have to live in this universe, not in a universityEducation India
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Tantra does not mean unbridled promiscuity. Today, the word tantra evokes all kinds of nasty things in people’s minds because most of the information that you know about tantra is rebound from the American shores. Even in India if you go into any bookstore, most of the books on tantra are written by American authorsIndia
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Somebody thinks your child is not normal, so what? But if he is happy, what’s the problem? That way none of you are normal in my perceptionProblems Perception
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If you get 99% you will end up in a medical college, if you get 90% you will end up in an engineering college. If you get 65%, your life will really open up, you can look around, what can I do with my Life.Education
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We do not have to go and clean the rivers; if we stop polluting them, they will clean themselves in one flood seasonRiver
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When a child enters your life, it's time to learn. Because, between you and your child, who is more joyful? So who should be a consultant for life?Life Children Joy
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Shutting your mouth is only half the job. To become silent is possible only if you do not think much of yourself
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Your age matters only if you are looking at marriage (Marri-age), do you understand? if you are looking at any other accomplishment, I don't see where age even comes in
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Even if the world is not kind to us, at least our own mind should be kind to ourselves- so produce some nice movies (in your head)Mind
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Suppose you and me die tomorrow morning, are we dying as a little better human beings than what we were a year ago - this is an important question. If we live, wonderful! Suppose we die, there’s no regret. Very important or not?Death Being human
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There is a big mistake about the way we are perceiving life. When one gets corrected, people think you are a mysticLife
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I use humor because- If the same thing is told to you in at most seriousness, you will
make a dogma of it, which is very dangerousTruth Witty
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You're the only one who has the privilege of being called a "being". We don't call a Lion- a "Lion being", tiger- a "tiger being", we refer to you as a human being because supposed to know how to BE, but how far from truth is that?Truth Being human
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For most people their idea of science is just the new telephone model that's coming up, the next model of I-phone is their idea of science.
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If the whole existence goes according to your will, where should I go? Some things happen your way, some things happen my way.Existence
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Even if you’ve taken up positive steps somebody else may be saying something. I don’t want somebody else’s evaluation of who you are. Within yourself sincerely you look and see have you moved forward as a human being? Because you are one year closer to your grave, are you going to at least die as a better human being if not live?
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Ravana was a great emperor & a blazing life. But unfortunately, a blazing life but without balance & a lot of bad pressLife Balance
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